Day 13: Three Confessions of Your Choice

I have a ‘friend’ when I was kid. Her name is Novi. She lived in my room and never walked out of the door. I always told my daily life in detail to her. I locked up myself after school for hours just to have conversation with her, because she didn’t want to chat outside my room. I know it sounds creepy and crazy. But I saw her. She was real in my eyes. She had long gone since I moved to Jakarta.

I’m still figuring out what my passion is. Since I met Abang and have been asked about passion thingy, I started to think what mine is. Passion is important enough to be defined immediately, so you can enjoy your life. Honestly, I don’t know what I love most in my life. I don’t have particular idols. I don’t have particular activity or interest that I really enjoy for long time. Though I almost finish my master program, I’m not really sure what I’m going to do after graduate. Ok, I’ll get a job. Hopefully it will be fast and suit my expectation.

I over-think about true love. Sometimes I have this thought on my mind: does my bf love me truly? Honestly, I had a bad experience about love, some kind of trauma maybe. Once, I loved a guy and gave all my love but he just threw it away. Since then, I often think if my bf really loves me or not. I have a fear of losing my beloved one. I also over-think about love-lust matter. Still, how do you distinguish between love and lust? Question.


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